Who Are You People?: A Search Terms Roundup

Reviewing one’s blog statistics can be a real ego boost (“Yay! Thanks for the ratings bump, Kevin Tydlaska!”) or ego killer (“Wahh! Did I weird people out by talking about my Daddy issues?”)

But mostly it’s just confusing. I have an MBA in Marketing and I still can’t figure out exactly who reads, why they read, and how they get here.

Despite my efforts, I can’t predict which posts will land, how many people will see my facebook links, or which time/day is best for posting.

Some days I’m just like…

cat masterpiece

And then the stats are like…

your work is bad

Regardless, there’s one constant I can always count on: amusing search terms.

When someone finds my blog via google, I get to see what they searched. Let’s take a look at a selection, in order of ascending weirdness:

- back to home blog
Oh, so close. This has been searched multiple times. Not sure if this is what you were looking for, but welcome.

-your mother doesn’t work here
By far the most popular search term. I guess a lot of people have slovenly coworkers.

-improv cult
Yep, pretty proud of that one.

-cat two timing
This is apparently a common phenomenon.

-someone eat a lot / “getting fat” / I’m getting fat / getting fat blog
Thanks a lot, daddy.

-man flu sexist / definition man flu / man flu aka cold / woman flu jokes / man flu jokes
My man flu post unwittingly attracts users from all parts of the sexist spectrum.

-darcy carden and husband
While I’m an admitted stalker of D’Arcy Carden, I don’t know anything about her husband. Yet.

-new sitcom women moves back home
I believe you were looking for How To Live With Your Parents (For The Rest Of Your Life), and I wish I’d written it.

-who invented kool-aid
I still don’t know.

-wife excuese not cleaning
Was this searched by a wife looking for usable excuses? Or a husband that doesn’t want to put up with her crap anymore?

-embarrassing lesbian
That would be you, Rae.

-otak liburan
Google tells me this is Indonesian for “vacation brain”. I’ve sort of got that.

-when can i get a bra in the palisades mall
Not where. When.

-bible quotes for improvisation
Nope. I should probably learn some though.

-door confrontations don’t work
Is “door confrontations” a saying? I’m just picturing someone yelling at a door.

-woman fail
Rude.

-how to be a spiteful bitch
Rude.

-tina fey leather
(shrug) I’m okay with that.

-independent woman will smith
That’s totally how I see him too.

Have you had your work misconstrued by the masses?

Comments

  1. I get SO many searches for Tina Fey nude!! Wonder if she knows how coveted she is?!
    Stephanie recently posted…Update on Project Patience, My Lenten AppealMy Profile

  2. “how to be a spiteful bitch” is very funny to me for some reason. I’d need help with that, too.
    thoughtsappear recently posted…Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me a MatchMy Profile

  3. Ha! I’m kind of scared to know what search terms bring people to my blog.

    Maybe it’s better I don’t know. Then again, I do like stalkers……
    Phil recently posted…Why Make The Rat Race Worse Than It Is?My Profile

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