I took a look at the hairstyle icons I’ve emulated over my life, and the results were at least a little embarrassing…
“Not even three years old, she knew that yellow hair is king.”
1. The Rachel
Was there anyone that didn’t have this haircut? I was in elementary school when Friends debuted (And, btw, in college when it ended. No wonder it was my primary model for adulthood.) After 11 years of not caring about hair, I suddenly needed the Rachel.
And, not to be one of those ladies from What Not To Wear that gets stuck with the same hairstyle for 30 years, but I still require some variation of layers and angles to this day. So, in a way, the Rachel never really left us.
To be fair, my friend Caitlin had this haircut first, but we thought it was weird and made fun of her nonstop until Jennifer Aniston arrived on the scene.
Jumping way ahead, because high school was a bad time for hair (for me)…
2. The Ashlee Simpson
AKA the Pieces of Me. Remember that awful song? My roommate Brianna secretly listened to the album in her car, which made it all the more amusing when she got caught, because she’d tried to hide it.
I don’t know who made us all go blonde in the first place. Why not blame Jessica Simpson? But then Ashlee dumped her 7th Heaven blonde look, decided she would pretend she could sing, and sheep (like me) everywhere threw their peroxide out the window.
Society was all “You have blonde hair? Still?? Fix that shit and get a nose job while you’re at it.”
For the record, I liked her old nose better but she didn’t consult me. She’s probably happy with the outcome though so, good for her.
3. The Freaky Friday
Maybe I’m alone in my millennial admiration for Lindsay Lohan, but a few people told me I looked like her (freckles are our only common feature), I took it as a compliment, and ran with it.
When I get a personal stylist on staff, I’m going back to this look.
4. The Portia
AKA the Honeymoon. Portia de Rossi has great hair. I do not. But this was one style I was able to copy. Technically, I didn’t copy it but just happened to get a similar cut around the same time.
…We’re practically twins. Except that Tom and I had to be our own paparazzi.
I have to admit, this haircut was an impulse. It turned out cute though, for a while. Now I’m still waiting for my lopsided hair to even out.
Now, the question you’re all dying to know the answer to: who will my next hair icon be?