My Hairstyle Icons: An (Embarrassing) History

The 70s had Farrah Fawcett. The 80s had Pat Benatar. What will be my generation’s legacy?

I took a look at the hairstyle icons I’ve emulated over my life, and the results were at least a little embarrassing…

my very first hair icon

my very first hair icon

“Not even three years old, she knew that yellow hair is king.”
-Tina Fey

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Why I Hate Twitter (But Will Continue to Use It)

I was a relatively early adopter of twitter. It was probably 2007 when I joined, because I heard Elvis Duran and the Morning Show talking about celebrity tweets, and I thought “I can know what John Mayer is up to at all times? Cool.”

apparently this is called the hipster barista meme *the more you know*

apparently this is called the hipster barista meme
*the more you know*

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You’re Invited: Equality Theme Party

I love a good theme party. Proof:

theme party addiction

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Stop Thinking. Enjoy Now.

So, I listen to this UCB podcast, where they interview different improv performers, and it’s kind of great. Because they talk about when they were first starting out, and how they weren’t confident at first, and how they got rejected at auditions. And I think “Oh, cool. These successful improvees were once like me, but they stuck with it and it worked out.”

But then I think

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Moves Like Phoebe

Sunday bonus post!

The other day, I was walking to the train at Hunterspoint Ave and I saw this guy running ahead to catch the train.

He was running like Phoebe from Friends, only with a messenger bag.

“That’s not running! This is running! Let’s gooo!”

It made me really happy.

Also, I caught the same train as him, so I don’t know why he was running. Maybe he wanted to make sure he had time for a trank.

Happy Sunday! :)

Living Is Dying

Bonus Saturday Post!

As you may recall, Tom sent me some beautiful roses for Valentine’s Day last week. Sadly, despite their 7-Day Guarantee, these flowers did not stand a chance with the dry heat in my office.

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What Women Don’t Want For Valentine’s Day

The real title should be:
What Women Don’t Want For Valentine’s Day, or, Nice Try Vermont Teddy Bear

Have you seen this commercial?

(email readers click to the blog to view)

Without getting into how stupid the commercial itself is, I must say this is the worst gift idea I’ve seen in a while. Guys, here are a few reasons to cancel your Big Hunka Love Bear orders real quick…
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This Is My Brain On Drugs

I had to take a lot of cold medicine to get through my first day back at work. I’m pretty sensitive to decongestants. Even though I’m not even on the hard stuff (pseudoephedrine), the phenylephrine gets to me after a while too.

It’s gotten my conscious mind talking more than usual, which I didn’t think was possible. Just talking and talking. Deeper, sometimes darker thoughts than I’m used to. It’s very annoying.

I finally realized I need a break… from my own brain. I wish I could take a vacation from myself.

But what would be going on in my brain if my voice wasn’t yammering at me? Just peace? I think I’ve achieved that once or twice.

Or maybe, when I go on vacation from myself, I go with the voice. I mean, my conscious brain is the real me, right? So maybe I, the voice, just need to get untrapped from this tiny head.

…When I got to this point in my story at dinner, my husband Tom suggested that might be my cue to write. He only looked slightly scared when he said it.

So there you have it. You can thank Tom (or Mucinex) for this.

Or maybe next time I have a cold, I’ll just take a week off from blogging and not subject you to my decongestant-acid-trips.

this is your brain on vacation... credit

this is my brain on vacation…


(Any questions?)


Farewell to 30 Rock

Listen up fives, a ten is speaking.

Tomorrow is the series finale of 30 Rock, and every time I think about it, my throat shuts up faster than a girl in math class.

This show has always been there for me. Like a work husband / uncle.

There are only two things I can think of to honor it:

1. Celebrate Leap Day every four years for the rest of my life.

“Leap Day” is probably my favorite episode of 30 Rock ever. Check it out wherever videos are streamed.

This is me on Leap Day last year.

Leap Day Jill-iam

And be sure to stop by my swanky New York pied-a-terre on 2/29/16 (I assume I’ll be ballin’ by then), when Tom has agreed to play Leap Day William, who emerges from the Mariana Trench every four years to give out candy in exchange for children’s tears.

Kenneth as Leap Day William

Kenneth as Leap Day William

And we can make this happen, guys. I mean, Festivus is still happening.

2. Gif parade.



laser shield

Have you ever had losing a TV show feel like losing a friend?

An Insider Exposé: The Improv Cult

As you may recall, I have recently started taking Improv 101 at the Upright Citzens’ Brigade. I am slowly starting to suspect that UCB is a religion, possibly a cult.

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